


boys at school (techno dance mix): d.gray-man high school au; the one about text messaging

by warfare



Series: D.Gray-Man High School Alternate Universe [2]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-12-16
Updated: 2008-12-16
Packaged: 2017-10-19 04:45:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/197047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/warfare/pseuds/warfare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>wwwwwwwwwww</p>
            </blockquote>





	boys at school (techno dance mix): d.gray-man high school au; the one about text messaging

**Author's Note:**

> The first part of this was a gift drabble for [](http://partaken.livejournal.com/profile)[**partaken**](http://partaken.livejournal.com/); this is a good example of how ideas about this universe build in my head without any real driving plot or direction. As always for this universe, this is wildly self-indulgent and frankly I regret nothing.

"Ah, Yuu!!" Allen doesn't even bother to look up from his lunch to see what it is that has Lavi fussing; it's probably Kanda's fault anyway. "You still haven't sent me a response to that text I sent you! I waited all day yesterday..."

"I talked to you yesterday," Kanda barks around his yakisoba-pan, "in person."

"It's not the same as replying!" Lavi moans, simultaneously managing to sink further into his seat and scoot closer to Lenalee, seeking pity. "Like, I've got seventy-four messages to you in my sent folder, but only ten messages from you in my inbox!! Isn't that unfair? Unbalanced, somehow? Hey, hey, Lenalee, don't you think that's weird?"

"Kanda-kun," Lenalee says soothingly around a mouthful of sandwich, more to Lavi than Kanda, "When someone says something to you, don't you think you should respond?"

"IN WHAT WAY," Kanda snarls, "IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE A MESSAGE?!" He pulls out his phone and displays his messages.

"Ah --" Allen peers around Lenalee's shoulder, mouth still full, "that's a lot of emoticons. Lavi, what's the umbrella for?"

"Metaphor!!" Lavi responds smugly, as if he's been waiting for just this question, "For the rain in my heart that his not responding causes me!!"

Allen pulls Lenalee out of the way just in time as Kanda lunges over the desks at the redhead.

  
\---

  
When Allen and Lavi go out to eat, there's always a problem of pacing; even though Allen eats much more quickly than his friend, he's always still eating long after Lavi is finished. When they started this tradition of after-school hamburgers on days when Kanda and Lenalee have club activities, Lavi'd made an effort to fill the silence, but it's hard for a conversation to go anywhere when half of it consists of grunts around mouthfuls of food. He's learned to fiddle on his cell phone while he waits for Allen to come up for air.

"Ah," Lavi says one afternoon as Allen is plowing through his fifth double cheeseburger, "Yuu should be out of practice by now~ I'll ask him how it went." Allen gives his best I-could-care-less-what-that-jerk-has-to-say face, a real accomplishment around a mouthful of burger patty, and watches in mute awe as his friend's thumb flies across the keypad.

Less than fifteen seconds after Lavi has pressed 'send', his phone jangles with a response. He glances over the screen, then presses his lips together in a tight grin and presents it to Allen.

Kanda's response reads, in its entirety, "ive told you not to email me right after practice goddamn it."

"Ah," Allen notes, his laughter tired, "for someone who hates writing so much, Kanda's response time is unexpectedly fast, isn't it?" Lavi joins in laughing, grinning as he says,

"Yeah, Yuu's actually a really fast texter - look at the times I've sent emails and then when he responds." A cursory look through Lavi's sent and inbox confirms it - a text sent at 12:40:23 is replied to at 12:40:43 with 'this email had too many emoji and i didn't bother reading it'. One sent at 14:24:30 is replied to at 14:24:57 with 'what the hell should i care? do what you want'. There are several emails along the lines of 'WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU IT IS 3AM'.

"You really should be in bed at three in the morning, Lavi," Allen admonishes him gently.

"That only takes him ten seconds to type and send." Lavi sounds reverent and a little worried as he stares into the screen before leaning back in his seat and beginning to draft a reply. "It's like a superpower. Yuu can be really scary when he wants to."

  
\---

  
Kanda's superpower comes up a few weeks later; he's promised to meet Lenalee and (reluctantly) Allen at a shopping mall a few train stops away from the school after club activities in order to help her pick a birthday present for Lavi.

"I don't see why we had to invite Kanda," Allen mutters mostly to himself as they sit in the food court. Lenalee looks stern and reminds him as her fingers dance deftly over the keypad of her cell phone,

"You know Kanda-kun has known Lavi-kun for a really long time, easily as long as I have, and they're pretty good friends! We need his input." Allen doesn't bother to remind her that last year Kanda's birthday present to Lavi had been treating him to ramen, and he probably wouldn't have done anything if Lenalee hadn't been watching him so expectantly. "Ah--!! There!" She smiles brightly and presses send. Allen waits expectantly for the almost instantaneous reply he's come to expect from watching Lavi's texts.

The reply doesn't come for another five minutes at least. When it does, it's halting and choppy, clearly deeply thought about, and with backhanded but clear answers. It also arrives only two minutes before Kanda does, so it's virtually useless. When he walks up, Allen is reading the screen intently, Lenalee rifling through her purse for her wallet. He looks up and at Kanda with an expression somewhere between pity and disbelief, and asks,

"Kanda... is it possible that you've just... just memorized the key combination for a few set replies to Lavi's emails, and that in fact you're a really, _really_ slow texter?"

"Shut up," Kanda snaps, shoving his own cell phone further into his pocket.

"Also, you used the wrong kanji here."

"I said shut up, beansprout, not all of us can be fast at texting like a stupid first-year in high school."

"I _am_ a first year in high school! And it's not stupid to try to communicate!"

"WHAT communication? Have you READ these messages?"

"It's common decency to think of a real reply before you shoot off a response! Haven't you thought of Lavi's feelings?"

"MAYBE LAVI SHOULD STOP MAILING ME AT 3 IN THE MORNING."

"MAYBE YOU SHOULD LEARN TO PUT YOUR PHONE ON SILENT!"

"All right, that's enough." Suddenly Lenalee is between them, fingertips pushing them apart as if they're both made of paper. "Kanda-kun, we'll practice writing a real email to Lavi-kun later; in the meantime, let's go before the stores close." And then she's past them and moving toward the shops. Allen glares at Kanda momentarily before chasing after her, the charms on her cell phone jangling in his pocket. Kanda hefts his athletic bag over his shoulders with a scowl before loping after them.

  
\---

  
A week later at burgers, Lavi's phone jingles (a new ringtone, Allen notices - can't he keep anything longer than a month?) about halfway through fries. He checks the screen, then shows it to Allen with a vaguely surprised expression. It's from Kanda, unsolicited, several sentences in length. "That's weird, huh?" Lavi notes with a grin. Allen doesn't reply that in all likelihood Lenalee has cornered Kanda after practice and has forced him to write the note. Lavi replies, then goes back to his meal.

The next morning when Allen is walking past the shelter where students park their bicycles, he hears Lavi's voice.

"Ah, Yuu, g'mor-" And then suddenly there is the sound of metal crashing, people's bikes falling over in a domino effect, and Kanda is yelling,

"WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF RESPONSE IS A LINE OF 'W's?"

Allen sighs, making a mental note to see that Lavi and Kanda both lose their cell phones in their next game of poker.


End file.
